It didn't work.
I will tell you a sad story so you can see how sad I was. Not that this has anything to do with my story, of course. It's just a made up story--just so you get the sorta feeling that I had.
Or not.
Mary was a member of a ladies club that she went to every so often. She didn't always go, so sometimes she missed opportunities to do things the group did--like luncheons or parties and stuff. But she didn't really care--you know, Mary had other stuff to do.
One day, Mary got pulled aside by the lady in charge of the ladies club. She said "Mary, I'd like to give these lovely gold bars, worth a lot of money, to most of these ladies. They were in charge of fundraising all year and they worked really, really hard. We are giving them these very expensive, shiny, and pretty gold bars to thank them."
And Mary just sat there wondering why she was hearing this.
"So, Mary, would you mind going to the store to buy the best wrapping paper ever to wrap these gold bars for the ladies? And oh, would you stop and pick up some cookies on your way too, so we can thank them with delicious yummy treats as well?"
"Uh, sure" said Mary. And she didn't really mind.....
until later.
Then her feelings were sort of hurt because she wasn't getting a gold bar--even though she knew that she didn't really earn one. But still, her heart hurt a little as she tied those pretty bows on all of their gold bars.
The End.
This is the story discussion part:
1) Was Mary wrong for feeling a little left out?
2) Have you ever felt like Mary?
3) Even though Mary is old enough to know better, can you understand why she felt the way she did?
4) Do you think it would be wrong of Mary to spit on the cookies?
Discuss amongst yourselves...
14 comments:
I suppose there is a moral in there somewhere. We shall have to explore that in our discussion group.
This is why I don't join ladies groups. LOL Because I would be the one spitting on the cookies.
Then there was Tom. Tom was eating in a restaurant that was not the most up scale sort of place he had ever been. He had ordered a steak, something that was very special to him because he rarely had the chance to eat so well. His steak came out from the kitchen. It looked perfect. It smelled wonderful. He took a bite, and it tasted even better. It was the best piece of meat he had ever eaten. Soon, Tom realized he needed to use the bathroom. He worried that someone would eat his perfect steak. So he took a pen from his pocket and wrote on the napkin, "I spat on this steak." He left the room and returned a very short while later. He could see that his steak was still intact. As he sat back down he saw written beneath his note on the napkin, "Yah, me too."
Wrong to spit on the cookies.
Mary was not wrong for feeling left out. Awards for service are really an incentive to make those who are not pulling their weight feel left out and push them to do better. The people that did the work know they did the work, however it's nice to get the recognition (this from the person who will have "Hell, I'll do it" carved on her tombstone.
If Mary wants a gold bar she should show up more, do more fundraising etc or happily tie bows on the bars and tell herself she didn't want a crummy gold bar anyway.
It was kind of Mary's own doing for not earning herself a gold bar. She didn't deserve one if she wasn't there doing everything the other ladies were.
However, the spitting would be wrong.
And another thing, if I was Mary, there ain't no way I'd go buy the pretty paper and cookies and wrap 'em up. I'm a jerk like that.
Was EVERYONE in the group but Mary getting a gold bar or just the members of one committee. If it was just the one committee who did the fundraising work and Mary did not contribute to the fundraising at all then Mary really has no cause to be upset.
If everyone BUT Mary is receiving an award then there is cause for upset because I am sure that Mary was not the only member with less than perfect attendance.
More info is needed before an answer can be given and it is NEVER ok to spit on the cookies. To trip and drop them on the floor as you are delivering them to the refreshment table - well that is another thing altogether.
Poor Mary. Yes I can relate to the being left out part.
Mary shouldn't worry about those crummy gold bars. She should just go out and treat herself to something special...like a new necklace, and make all the other ladies jealous, when they realize that their gold bar is not half as nice as Marys special item!
However, Mary should not spit on the cookies...even tho she wants to.
Vanilla--Sometimes the moral isn't apparent until you set and think a bit. Today, the moral is more clear--like the people who are getting them really deserve them and Mary should just be happy for them and make the best bows EVER for those gold bars. Mary is much more mature today....and a better human being. :)
Diane--Thank you, Diane! At least you THOUGHT about spitting on the cookies--which is what I would do too. Sometimes we are asked to do things we don't want to do and the "adult" in us has to come forth and guide us through. Go Mary! Make those bows extra nice!
Chuck--EWWWW! I don't think Mary wrote that note, do you??? If it was...BAD Mary!
Winnie--But what about just THINKING about spitting on them? ;) I think it was the idea that there were some people included in the gold bar distribution that didn't necessarily earn them that bothered Mary. BUT, it wasn't up to Mary to decide, was it? Yep, that's the hard part. Mary later learned that the people earning the gold bars were truly the ones who deserved it and she smiled a happy smile as she made those bows extra special for them. Mary's heart and maturity grew a wee bit from the experience.
Liz--Sometimes you are not given the opportunity to be a part of the Gold Bar Team--but you have to stand and cheer for those who get the credit. That's the hard part. And WRAPPING the gold bars is even harder. I think that when Mary learned of who was actually getting the gold bars, she was very happy for those deserving people. Sometimes it's hard to be an adult when the inner child is in there screaming. And sometimes it takes a day for the dust to settle and be mature about things. BTW--Mary made the BEST bows EVER for those gold bars--it's about pride in her work.
Nope, Mary wasn't wrong for feeling left out but then if she didn't earn it she should be left out. I can understand why she felt that way since we all do things even though we're old enough to know better.
Since this is a ladies club and ladies don't spit I think it would be wrong of her to spit on the cookies. I do however feel that Patty is on the right track regarding dropping them on the floor though
Yes...I do feel a bit bad for her. I mean, perhaps she really wanted to be more a part of the group but she had other things keeping her away, things she really couldn't help or change.
Patty--Oooh, I like the passive aggressive approach, Patty! ;) It just happened that it was one particular group of hard-working fundraising gals. Mary realized that they deserved the gold bars and she made the BEST bows ever! I think sometimes it's best to wait to see the whole story before you freak out. Mary is a freak out on the best of days. Poor Mary. I hope she learned from this.
Hot Rocks--I think it is natural to feel left out too. I also think Mary needs to be adult about things and do her best in wrapping the gold bars even though she is not getting one. I think sometimes we may not know the whole story and we, like Mary, jump to conclusions. In the end, Mary did what was right (and mature) and moved on.
Ann--I agree with you--I think it hurt Mary's feelings to be included this one time....to WRAP the gold bars. Ugh! Sometimes that 5-year old self isn't too far below the surface, you know? Mary realized that the people getting the gold bars deserved them and she wrapped them as lovely as ever. And she did not spit on the cookies. ;)
Nancy--Bingo. See--that's how I take it. Mary wasn't always around for the work or the fun, but somehow they managed to find her for the special honor of wrapping the gold bars. And while she is an adult, that still hurt Mary's feelings. In the end, Mary was mature and realized that those getting the gold bars really deserved them and she wrapped them beautifully for them to enjoy. She didn't even spit on the cookies. :)
I feel bad for Mary for having to wrap the gold bars for the rest of the group. That was pretty crappy and warrants the thought of spitting on the cookies she had to buy too! But, no, nothing warrants actually spitting on them but thinking about it is okay.
Thanks for your concern for Sadie too. I appreciate it!
Poor Mary! I'm totally with Diane Cayton-Hakey. That's the reason why I never join any ladies group too! But I wouldn't have spat on the cookies - I would have sprinkled laxatives on them!
I might not of spit on the cookies. I might of licked one side of all of them though. ;)
xo Catherine
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